My Scrapped Wedding Speech

Two of my best friends had gotten married last summer and being in the wedding party I was tasked to write a speech. I took a minute to think of all of the grooms men/bridesmaid speeches and wedding sermons I had heard over the years and set to the task of writing my speech. I had plenty of time to write and edit it but I was very excited to start it so I did. I did a nice intro talking about how I knew the be-wedded but from there I went blank. So I set it aside and wrote what you see below. From there I would re-add an intro and then talk about the couple a little more and toast them. Then I got a text from the bride kindly reminding us that we should get started on our speeches if we had not yet and to keep them under four minutes as there would be six of us talking. I came back to speech, still intro-less, still not personal and with no toast at the end and timed myself at six minutes. Unfortunately I had to scrap this. Also unfortunately, as many laughs as it got, the whole message got set aside for a completely different speech. But I would still like to share it. Please enjoy.

I'd like to say a few words about marriage. In Ephesians 5:22-24 the apostle Paul writes “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. ₂₃For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. ₂₄Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.” Eek... Not exactly a popular statement is it? In this example the husband is a god and the wife is his lowly servant. He will make demands and she will have to obey and serve and worship. She may as well be seen and not heard as well. Right? Well before we go on, Paul gives some instructions to husbands, starting at verse 25, “₂₅Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her ₂₆to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, ₂₇and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. ₂₈In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. ₂₉After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church-- ₃₀for we are members of his body.” Husbands are to act as Christ in their marriage and maybe in the future, are to reflect the Father to their children. Well we all know John 3:16, husbands are to love their wives like God loves us. Always concerned for our well-being. Wives, no one goes to church saying, well I guess I have to worship Jesus at this service. No, we put on nice clothes, beg forgiveness for our sins, and hope to reflect a loving a Christian attitude for the rest of the week. In that same way, wives should be happy to serve their husbands in the same way. That means letting people know about how much you love your husband, serving him in whatever ways he needs it, be it dinner after work, washing his clothes, or going to work to help pay the bills. Husbands, as an authority over your marriage, you are given a great responsibility. You are to act as a moral compass for your families. If your family does something that is spiritually harmful, the Holy Spirit, through the Apostle Paul commands you to rectify that situation. While acting as Christ in your marriage, you must love your wife as much as God loves us. Therefore, do not over burden your wife with demands. Do not ask her to do things that may be spiritually harmful. While you may never have to give your life for her, act as though you would. As we can bring our troubles to Christ to easy our burdens, do the same for her, be it dinner after work, washing her clothes, or going to work to help pay the bills. As you can see, a wife being a model of the church and the husband being a model for Christ aren't that different. In fact, if you're not a husband or a wife, as Christians, we should always live Christ imitating lives. In verses 1 and 2 of this chapter, Paul writes, “₁Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children ₂and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” And in verse 21, “₂₁Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” When everyone is living a Christ-like life it's hard to cause arguments among ourselves or exacerbate our wives with a display of power. This also doesn't mean that the wife is without a voice. Without a doubt, one day a couple will fight, and if the solution can be pointed to through scripture due to the sinful shortcoming of the husband, it certainly is a wife's responsibility to let her husband know, but I encourage you that if, with a cool head, you can say your are my husband and I want to serve you and I want you to love me, to try set aside the difference and work through it in another manner. Paul finishes this by reciting Genesis 2 and restating his point. “₃₁"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." ₃₂This is a profound mystery--but I am talking about Christ and the church. ₃₃However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”